1. Isn’t it just Thor? A strange handsome man comes down to Earth, makes me feel inadequate, struggles to adapt to human life, has a fight in a small isolated town, and bags himself a girlfriend.
2. Or isn’t it just Superman?
3. But a Superman without a maniacal bald man or Richard Pryor on skis.
4. How exactly does Clark/Kal-El/Superman find that big ship in the middle of nowhere? I get he can fly and shit but an innate sense of direction? That’s just too farfetched.
5. Henry Cavill looks good with a beard.
6. Perry White is Perry Black!
7. Henry Cavill looks good in a cape.
8. Metropolis appears to be populated entirely by journalists.
9. How many times does Zod fly off in his ship only to return minutes later? How often do Kryptonians need a poo?
10. Henry Cavill looks good on fire.
11. 70% of the film is just geezers crashing through walls.
12. A screaming Henry Cavill can fly into my hole any time.