It. Goes. On. And. On. And. On. At one point in the film it
seamlessly fast forwards ten years, IN REAL TIME. Coming out of the cinema I looked
and felt like a weary, bearded Moses after one of his long walks. BECAUSE HE
LOVES A GOOD OL’ LONG WALK.
Speaking of beards, a
beardy Christian Bale wandering into the mountains only to return to the city
years later to save the people of Gotham Memphis? IT’S A BIBLICAL BATMAN
BEGINS!
Hang on, where’s Ben Kingsley? He’s always in these sorts of
films.
Is that Yul Brynner? Oh no, it’s Joel Edgerton. I was hoping
for a few musical numbers.
Because I was brought up to think that’s what Rameses and
Moses did with their lives.
What’s Aaron Paul doing here?
CROCODILES!
FROGS!
Has it finished yet? I need a wee.
There is a child playing God. If I was a kid and played GOD
it would have gone to my head. How does this kid not acquire anything less than
a gigantic ego? Surely God can only be played by an experienced and humble
actor such as Morgan Freeman, or Alanis Morissette.
It was alright though.
